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emmahircine posts

Why do rogues wear leather armour? Because it’s made of hide..

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What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards? A r..

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What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare-line.

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Why should you never get in a fight with Tryptophan? It’s am..

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Why should you never get in a fight with Tryptophan? It’s amino acid.

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What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi.

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What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi.

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FASTEST FINGER DELIVERY!! The first to tip $20 will get a $1..

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FASTEST FINGER DELIVERY!! The first to tip $20 will get a $150 worth of video bundle!!

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Don't wanna *bug* you, but do you like my butterfly outfit?

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Don't wanna *bug* you, but do you like my butterfly outfit?

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I sock-sessfully uploaded the best bundle EVER! 🧦🦶🏻👣 https..

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Smonday. The moment when Sunday is overtaken by the sadness ..

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Smonday. The moment when Sunday is overtaken by the sadness and anxiety of the coming Monday.

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Boss: How good are you are PowerPoint? Me: I Excel at it. Bo..

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Boss: How good are you are PowerPoint? Me: I Excel at it. Boss: Was that a Microsoft Office pun? Me: Word.

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This morning I saw a person dragging a clam on a leash behin..

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This morning I saw a person dragging a clam on a leash behind him. It must be hard to walk with a pulled mussel.

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Two men are on opposite sides of the river. The first man sh..

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Two men are on opposite sides of the river. The first man shouts, “How do I get to the other side of the river?” The other man shouts back, “You ARE on the other side of the river.”

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What’s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What’s purple and fluf

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What’s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What’s purple and fluf

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. ..

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender turns to them and says… “What is this, some kind of joke?”

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There were two muffins in an oven and one said, “It’s gettin..

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There were two muffins in an oven and one said, “It’s getting kind of hot in here isn’t it?”. The other muffin gasps, “Ahh! A talking muffin!” his cabinet.

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The CEO of Ikea was appointed Prime Minister of Sweden. He’s..

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The CEO of Ikea was appointed Prime Minister of Sweden. He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

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Boss told me that as a security guard, it’s my job to watch ..

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Boss told me that as a security guard, it’s my job to watch the office. I’m on season 6 but I’m not really sure what it’s got to do with security.

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A lawyer said to a judge, “My client is trapped inside a pen..

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A lawyer said to a judge, “My client is trapped inside a penny.” The judge said, “What?” and the lawyer said, “He’s in a cent.”

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What’s a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

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What’s a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

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Did you know that Davy Crockett had three ears? His left ear..

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Did you know that Davy Crockett had three ears? His left ear, his right ear, and his wild frontier.

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What did the taco say to Michelangelo? I like your shell

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What did the taco say to Michelangelo? I like your shell

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I like what mechanics wear…overall...

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I like what mechanics wear…overall...

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Spin the wheel and see what mischief awaits! 😈🎯 💟1 spin for..

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I see a bad moon rising...

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I see a bad moon rising...

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I sympathize with batteries. I’m not included in anything ei..

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I sympathize with batteries. I’m not included in anything either.

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